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Thursday, November 08, 2012 9:06 am
facade listen, ♥A typical definition of family is defined as such - a social group in society, typically consisting of the parents and their children where two or more people who share goals and values, have long term commitments to one another, and reside in the same dwelling place. My family on the other hand, is defined as - a social group in society, consisting of the parents and their children, where everything was founded on lies, lies and more lies. Please, enlighten me on the godforsaken life I lead. This is plain bull shit, nonsense and a whole lot of crap. How much of these must I really endure before I decide to give it all up? Six months into the saga, another errupts. What more do you want from me? Have I not exhausted my all the last time? And then again, the same shit happens. What more am I suppose to do before everything will go back to what it was before? I'll rather live a lie and not find out about anything, be a stupid typical bimbo, but I cannot. I just cannot bring myself to do such things. The people I love and care about my whole life, is slowly fading away. And yes, I'm crumbling. You can judge me, hurt me, think that I'm a complete idiot, a spoil brat and what not. I accept every damn title people say about me, to hurt me, to try to bring me down. Cause it no longer matters. If the people I spent my whole life loving can hurt me this way, why would other's treatment of me matter anyway? I am very well aware that people do hate me for who I am and what they think I've got. GO AHEAD AND REJOICE WHILE I AM AT MY LOWEST POINT IN LIFE. Cause really, nothing seems to matter anymore. People assume that I have the best family in the world, but that's what they think they see. What is left unseen, are the scars and tears that I have shed, just to keep this forsaken social unit going. And why, why must I be the one with such responsibilities? I hate my life. I hate the way people treat me. I hate how I'm crying as I type this whole damn shit. It hurts, it really hurts to be treated like this when you spent your whole life trying to make things whole, when you spend all your time and effort in the silence, trying to make things better. THINGS ARE NOT GONNA GET BETTER, IT'S NOT! The people that I thought I could never live without, has become individuals that are slowly fading away, a memory, a facade that I was trying to keep, even until this point. And I'm giving up. I'm giving it all up. Why should I care anyway? What do I get out of this? Hurt, pain and nothing but sorrow. So why should I bother? Just give me 3 years, stick together in this given time frame and when everything is over, you can do whatever you want and as you deem fit. I'm not gonna care anymore. All I'm asking is for 3 damn years, that's all I want and need cause I don't see any reason in being around here there after. I need strength to pull through. I'm so tired of everything. Just when I thought things were getting better, another challenge comes in the way. I'm so tired of struggling to get by every damn day. God said he wouldn't give more than I can take, but time and again, I feel that I have too much on my plate. |
♥  MARTHA KATHLEEN CLARE SOH RUILING! Bestf! ♥ Fareen Yeo ♥ Partner-in-Crime ♥ February ♥ Jung Yonghwa 정용화 ♥ CNBLUE! 씨엔블루 ♥ Tiffany Hwang 티파니 ♥ Reminisce,
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Applause, |
| Everything you want, is on the other side of fear. | |